hello.
okay.i dont know whats wrong with me today.
i mean yeah.i was staring blankly through spaces.
like the whole way through my classes today.
puny tried to make me do something today
in front of the class during english class.when i dont even have the mood.
he was trying to make me say 'I LOVE HOMEWORK!' like i really mean it.
i wasnt in the mood.but yeah i did say it after sometime.
during DNT i almost fell asleep.in CS too.
but i slapped myself once twice to stop myself from dozing.
used to be i always pay attention to MATHS lesson.
but today i cant even be bothered with the lesson.
like i said i was STARING AT THE SPACES.
then in the afternoon.ate with janeen.
after that,spend time with my teammates.
but i kept staring at one part of the canteen.
i dont know why this days.i kept worrying about her.
how she is doing after every little shayt happen to her.
she obtain leg cramps on BOTH legs.
i pity her.i tried to ask her.but she was like giving me that face.
so i cant be bothered.
okay the FIXTURES are finally out.
my first match is next WEDNESDAY.
one more week to go.man thats is like freaking long.
but there is one bad thing about this competition.
its at NTU.its bloody freaking far from my school.
another thing i hate the pitch.but ill have to play in any case.
how can i like make it to her match on time you tell me?
okay but ill try.luckily her first match is like at 4.30.
so i think i can make it on time.in SCHOOL UNIFORM.
okay first match with STC!at NTU.
same place same team.same date.
i hope history wont repeat itself like last year.
i still remember that particular day.
me and monkey was like angry at each other.
both of us couldnt concentrate in the game cause of that.
but we are going to change the history.aint that right team?
okay.finally get to meet my ex-CRUSH.that was long ago.sec one life.
hahah.now officially become my SISTER.
cause she was supposed to be my MUM.after some things happen.
last year.but she feel that old with me calling her that.
so she will be my sister then.i finally get a hug and a kiss from my
darling sister SHAFINA.and guess what.she still hasnt change a bit.
she seems like she dint grow over time.hahha.sorry no offence.
you did grow lah sister.dint catch up much with her.
seeing her make me happy a while.but yeah.
i wasnt in the mood totally today.
theory lesson i wasnt paying attention to coach.
i was listening.writing down the details and notes.
but i was like not into theory just now.
like my body was there but my mind wasnt
then we got little bit of pratice of stick work.
we have to do 2000 times.
and my wrist was hurting when i reach 1237.
but i dint stop continued until the end.
i was tired then.we did somemore practice.
before coach end the session.
so at the end.accompany shafina a while.
followed her walking around school like mad people.
but it was fun.its was along time.since she took my hands
and pulling me all over the place.esp in school.
MISS YOU LOTS SHAFINA.thanks for trying to make my day.
but i wasnt still that high then.somebody was still stuck in my mind.
i miss her more than anything.i dont know when we are going to meet.
when im free she isnt.when she is im not.
it is an obstacle which just fall right down the sky to stand in our path.
but we might be watching harry potter together if my parents
really dont want to sit in the cinema watching it.
i got extra two tickets or maybe three depends on my dad.
in the car on the way home
my dad was like i dont feel like joining you people watching the show.
i rather go follow your mom shopping around.
im not interested in harry potter.so why dont you bring your girlfriend.
and another friend down.cause like adik wanna go.if not i just let you and your
friends go.but ill see how if i can get an extra ticket for your twin couple.
ill try okay.my dad said that to me in the car.i was like are you serious.
but its not confirm yet.he just told me to tell you all to just make yourself free.
can i not love my dad like this.of course i love him.he rocks my world.hahah.
thanks dad.but still he havent answer about sunday.
i think ill ask again tomorrow.he is fetching me tomorrow after training.
so i can have private talk with my dad again.
okay.im quite disappointed with someone right now.
she set the rules for me not to cut curves and play with fire.
like i used to release stress with burning candles and let the wax drip down
my thighs just to feel the pain.but now i stopped but she doing it.
im really disappointed in you.you actually dare to tell me that you got three marks.
on your wrist.two cause of penknife.i dont know what were you thinking.
i just got to know.i kept on worrying about her cause of the shit happens.
and she have to do this to me.i feel like i dont want to talk to you.
but i cant.i promise ill be there for you.and i cant go back my words.
you better listen to me.stop doing whatever you are doing.
you can even tell me that those cut curve marks is because you were playing
with penknife and it accidentally cut your wrist.it doesnt make any sense.
thanks for making my day worst.okay forget it.
im missing you badly lah syg.
you not smsing me no more.chatting today also not much.
this is really killing me.can anyone make the clock move faster.
please im begging you.
overall today is a bloody freaking day.
cause i cant feel you close to me.like i lost your grip.








when you're gone the pieces of my heart are missing you.



i love you.



i miss you.